somkritya » Soma Mukherjee

A Dinner never Lies

Soma Mukherjee — Thu, 31 May 2012 17:46:39 +0000

I used to love reading and watching movies. my favourite genres were thrillers and horror. yes i had a dark side and every now and then i used t let it out and pamper its wants and then hide it behind this sweet romantic exterior.

But that was Yesterday,Today i am minutes away from being someones dinner and the table tells me its going to be quick and painless.

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦

They say if you watch horror movie once in a while

you will have nightmares full of gore and vile

but if ever you cross that 500 movie limit

devil himself will pay you a visit

But how the devil will look you will never know

it may be as a thing,a person or a cow or a crow

and if this happens to be on friday the first

you will be on his menu quenching his thirst

~a very drunk man

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦

Yesterday

And i woke up to the shrill sound of kettle..

it took me a while to realise i hadn’t put anything on the stove.

what if there has been an intruder,of course what else can it be?

boy some gutsy fella making tea for himself like this.should i call police or surprise that fellow with the base-ball bat near….

i sat up and saw the Television still on and a psycho, killing people while the kettle screams for attention…..ugh so there isn’t any intruder

and then came a voice from the television,”so are you going to switch me off or do i re -incarnate as a human to do that”

“excuse me!” i said and realised i was talking to TV

“yeah like she will, come on get up you lazy bum”, said the sofa i was sitting on

..and i jumped up away from it..what the,…are these things talking NOW

“look at her expressions”, said the wall clock,”Hey Miss you have been watching horror movies back to back for last one week and this is shocking?”

“well now that you are up will you please clean me dry,said the vase,”cos these flowers have been inside me for past one week and now i look like hugging a dead body”

“well at least she uses you”, complained the ashtray,”i was picked up after heavy bargaining and not only she doesn’t smoke she doesn’t care to clean the dust off me.”

i was not over the shock yet but was able to breathe and move and i decided to go to the kitchen and ……..well maybe have some water and gather some sense of whatever i witnessed just now.

may be splashing my face with ice water will wake me up from this nightmare i am having

But as soon as i entered the kitchen the sink said “well hello! look who decided to pay us a visit, if it isn’t her Highness herself…to what do we owe such an honour mam”

i was stunned at the rude behaviour of the sink but before i could say anything or react further, it said “see the dishes here ,yeah the brown yellow ones,they were still white when you put them here and unless you are trying to see how long it takes for a dish to change colour kindly do wash them.i am done carrying so much weight and would love to breathe some fresh air.”

Oh there was so sarcasm in the air inside the house…

this cant be happening..what is this..am i dreaming,what kind of nightmare is this…

just then the fridge said,”she doesn’t seem well, what happened darling want some juice .”

“use me my expiry date is tomorrow!”, screamed the yogurt,

“hey me first”‘ said the pear ,

“guys chill she can’t eat everything.Miss if you ain’t gonna eat me kindly throw me in the garbage so that some poor guy can”, said the half eaten pizza from 3 days back.

i ran to the bedroom to change dress and go out for some fresh air when one of my black dresses said,” yeah use me you devil..abuse my body as much as you can but you can’t touch my soul..my soul fled the day it saw who was going to wear me.”

“tell me that”said the weighing scale

“hey i look gorgeous when i wear you “i told the dress ,”and i have lost oodles”

“OMG, said the mirror,”guys she really believes it”

I had tolerated enough and i had to get out so i decided to leave house in my pyjamas but as soon as i went out the hose pipe in the garden said,”err miss i don’t think you are ever going to use me, can you keep me in the garage, it gets dusty out here in summer”

Garbage can shouted hey miss,

the garage,the road,the toad,

the car,the tree from near and far

the birds flying up ,the snakes slithering down

the rats,the cats,the bats,the flying hats

they all spoke and shouted and screamed

no this can’t be i must be trapped in some bad dream

help me someone i cried and i ran

i ran and i ran and i ran

I ran and didn’t stop till i saw some familiar faces

and told them everything i just heard and Saw,they didnt look amused or shocked at all!

Mrs A advised cucumber juice

Mrs B said yoga

Mrs C told me to try looking up-side down

Mrs D suggested homeopathy

Mrs E shook her head and said i was too thin

please i begged tell me something which you know for sure will work,i am in deep trouble

Mrs F sneered and said well excuse us dear if you think your problems are big wait till you hear mine

“look at the bright side, you are still alive,arent you”, said a lamp post near by and smiled and that was when something hit my head and i blacked out…..

Artist-Sarbajeet Mukherjee

Filed under: Insane Zone, Stories from Under the Bed Tagged: Horror, Humor, Postaweek2012, story, WordPress, writing

Curio’s new friends-5 by Stuart Young

Soma Mukherjee — Mon, 28 May 2012 19:48:55 +0000

There are so many things in this beautiful world that are synonymous with happiness.

Smell of earth and the way world looks after the first showers, even the sunlight looks all fresh and clean..

The smell of something being baked or grilled,the croak of frogs in the rain,the sound of crickets chirping in the night.

Going for a trekking and finding out a mango tree all dressed up with fruits and then sit near a stream and eat them getting all messy

hugs,smell of books,hearty laughter ( don’t know any other way),dancing and singing

watching kids play games in park,their mischiefs and pranks,their excuses so cute

watching clouds form patterns and playing the guessing game

splashing in the puddle…

when our loved ones find a reason to smile :)

and for those who are happy souls the list is endless…

And if you are wonderfing why i am singing this ‘happy-appy’ song its cos one of my friends

Stuart has launched his book in a fabulous event recently.I will be sharing some pics of that event later in this post.

And cos there is an air of happiness around I am feeling generous too,so the 5th part of the Curio series is all yours to read and enjoy,which by the way may have something to do with love or at least the beginning of it

“when the same world all of a sudden wears a spring look

when the stolen glances have all the beauty of rainbow”

In this part of the series curio might have met someone but to know more you will have to read it and find out

and that someone may have liked him too,Nope, no way, no more read it and find out

there may be a triangle of….. hey i told you its a secret,and no one keeps secret as I do …..

Stuart is so good with teasing his readers,4th part was about surviving the harsh weather and the rough sea and 5th is about making friends, but for how long will this calmness and serenity last?

hmmmm….oh but this is life…unpredictable with sweet sour events on platter

Click the image to read the book in Google document

♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣

Now the very special part of this post

Stuart Young’s book (HOW TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE,One day at a time)launch was on may 20th

Please click the Book Cover below to know more about the book launch and to get more information on where you can buy your copy

or you can click the top widget on the right side widget bar to take you there

[About this book-Stuart says This book started off as a series of Tweets – “Take the opportunity today to hug someone you love, just for the hell of it! That was the first one, then out came another and another and pretty soon I was thinking of them every day. As the days ticked on I found myself thinking of more and more opportunities, each one having the possibility to change my life on that day, sometimes in a small way, sometimes in a BIG way. Eventually I decided to do one a day for an entire year and document my experiences in a journal ]

and for the launch pics click the image below,which by the way is a cake..drool

Have a great week and remember a hug a day keeps demons away or something like that

Curio and The Great Ridge-1 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)
Curio Begins to remember -2 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)
Curio’s Next Adventure-3 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)
Curio’s Incredible Journey -4 By Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)

Filed under: Reviews By Me Tagged: book review, Postaweek2012, WordPress, writing

The Lambretta Girl

Soma Mukherjee — Fri, 25 May 2012 02:09:15 +0000

This is a story

Story of the Lambretta Girl

But tell her that and she would tell you to change the title to story of a girl whose Father had a lambretta.

Ok,Fine whatever the title,this story has two heroes,the Girl and The Lambretta.

This girl was born on 16th of may on summer of 73 to Parents who knew just one way to live life-to be alive and aware at all times.

she grew up in a house where giving,sharing and caring for others was as normal and as easily done as breathing.

They used to travel a lot,short or long trips,meeting relatives, trekking,morning walks,going to shopping in the nearby city,you name it..

They would just get up,take whatever needed and go out to celebrate life.

That was where and this was how she learned to live life.

And although trekking and morning walks were fun,nothing could ever come close to when she would stand in the front space of lambretta or share the front seat with her Dad.

Oh the joy when you zoom past all that is on either side of the road

the air greets you first,the rush

you see the scenery and the people first,the pride

and you fight demons and creatures from the other world clearing the road for your father,the victory.

It was something else,had everything, great stories are made of.

And in those rides sometimes her parents would take a pause in a mango garden which was en-route to the city,where under the trees were Dragons to be killed,fairies to be freed and people waiting to be rescued, A warriors work is never done she would often say.

And when finally her royal carriage-The Lambretta, would land in the city, they would be greeted by all the earthlings,given royal salutes and grand welcome.

And while her parents would get busy shopping,she would help as many people as she could with one hand cos her mom or dad would never let her out of sight and hold her hand the entire time.

Things would get difficult ,try sword fight with one hand while one of your parents is holding your other arm.But she would never give up,after all it was her kingdom.

And one day and she wont be able to tell you the exact date,but when events are this unfortunate and heart wrenching who remembers the date,right?

This day she was asked to start sitting on the back seat( do I hear gasps and cries?)

Her father told her she had grown tall and now she would have to vacate that dream seat for her little brother.

Oh imagine the shock

Did I hear someone saying what’s the big deal,it’s not a big problem?

hey problems cannot and should not be compared ever,Had she heard you she would tell you that and hundreds of stories about how each problem is big in its own way and how she could never ever tell which one hurt more,a thorn or math.

Argue with that?

Oh how she wanted to tell her parents,what a big mistake they were making in giving the prestigious and most dangerous seat to her little brother,who not only couldn’t fight like her but also had no idea what a great thing day dreaming was!

who would save the world now,and if the news gets to the underworld and it would she knew that,those creatures would rise again and this time with renewed strength.

Finally the day came when she had to sit in the carrier of the scooter,which was the last seat and mostly used by people to carry inane things.Oh the shame,she hid her face with her mom’s Saree and didn’t/couldn’t enjoy the ride at all.

All the demons were laughing and the earthlings were looking at her with pity.

No,this can’t be happening she thought,she had to take control,she had a world to save.

so she thought why not save the world from here,the last seat and make the three people sitting before her,her bodyguards,after all she was a warrior princess,she could afford some of them,couldn’t she?

and soon law and order was restored in her kingdom and people were told princess was back and this time with bodyguards.

You may think of this as a silly story…

No problem, The Lambretta Girl would not take offence,simply cos super heroes cannot/do not explain how they saved zillions of life and not ever,even for once blow their own trumpet.

so think what you want to and say what you want to,for only the Girl with Lambretta knows how many times she flew across continents to save you life

For she is

Oh she is

Wow she is

The Lambretta girl

♠

And she would stand in the front

Or sit in the back

And fight the demons

And save the world

For she is

Oh she is

Wow she is a

The Lambretta girl

♠

She would look ordinary

And dress up like a commoner

And her weapons would be invisible

But her strikes would be powerful

For she is

Oh she is

Wow she is

The Lambretta Girl

♠

Under the dining table lies her kingdom

And Lambretta is her royal ride

And whenever you need her help

Just shout help me oh Lambretta girl

For she is

Oh she is

Wow she is

The Lambretta girl

♠

And she will reach you fast

And fight for you

And stand by you

Till you hug her good-bye

For she is

Oh she is

Wow she is

The Lambretta girl

♠

So this is a story of a Lambretta and a girl

The girl not so girl like

A tomboy

Climbing up trees

And playing with sand and mud

A misfit

Bad in studies

Good in dreaming

Would choose to be a warrior than be a princess

And oh Yes that’s me.

Filed under: Memoir, Story Tagged: humour, Lambretta, memoir, Postaweek2012, story, writing

Ya-aawn

Soma Mukherjee — Mon, 21 May 2012 17:57:25 +0000

There is a tree

that lives in my backyard,

in her youth she was infamous

for her loud snores and yawns,

and as all other trees were taken

the arboreals who lived on that tree

had no choice but to tolerate all that

but one day she took it too far

she yawned like she had never before

and she yawned and yawned and yawned

till it looked like she was crying and

Stretched her branches as far as she could

to shake off her laziness

Oh how could she, asked the clouds

and gossiped about it with the sun

Leaves and fruits fell down in bunches

oh! said the leaves,its not autumn

Ouch! said the fruits, that is so not fair

Oh you think you are the only ones hurt,

Asked the monkey and a squirrel

who had fallen on ground with a thud

Monkey said my bum would be red whole day

how would i explain this to my girlfriend

Squirrel started laughing and

Said your bum is always red

Not funny said the monkey

and pointed at squirrels bum which was red too

together they gave the tree a cold hard stare

They asked the tree to apologise and behave.

right then all of them heard a faint crack

they looked up at the nest on the tree

crack became louder

and out was a baby bird’s head

what was that, the baby squeaked

Oh that made Mama bird so mad

Look what you did, she asked the tree

My baby is one day too early

and her first words are not

Mom I am hungry!

To calm her down the squirrel said

Oh but what a cute little baby you have

That warmed up Mama birds heart and

she smiled with pride and said Yes she is

but I am not going to forgive the tree

and while they got busy loving the baby

and hating the tree

A cat and a dog who were playing

in the house came running

To see and be the part of the fight

Meow said the cat, she meant hey you guys have rights

You should report this incident, call the police

Woofs said the dog, call animal protection and sue the tree

Monkey said I will, first let me have some fruits

Squirrel said me too, after my stomach is full

and house well stocked

Mama bird had a baby to feed

and teach her new chirps

Meow and woof looked a little disappointed

and they called the tree boarders lazy and greedy

A snake who saw all this from his hole,came out

and hissed at both the cat and the dog

for talking like humans

Some worms even heard the hiss

using harsh words like humanoholic

Nearby an owl was watching all this

with sleepy eyes

He said hoo hoo hoo

Which clearly meant oh my god

and me oh I was carrying little bubbah

on my shoulder that day and

he said bub bub bub bub baaa and yawned

which shocked everyone

look what happens when you ya-aawn

and stretch your hands that wide

such a bad example was that tree

who still lives in my backyard

©Somkritya

Filed under: My Poetry, Story Tagged: Humor, poetry, Postaweek2012, story, WordPress, writing

Just a woman…..

Soma Mukherjee — Fri, 18 May 2012 06:23:12 +0000

I am hot and cool a beautiful bird

that one is dull a shabby little nerd

lets break them up, lets make them cry

too smart for my liking,lets wring them dry

the smirks and taunts

like ghosts they haunt

oh the girls, oh the boys

their innocent souls

hatred in blood

what have we done

……..

cuss on my lips,rage in my eyes

heart so bitter,how cool despise

an open market, lets get some gun

bang bang bang bang for venge or fun

he is black she is brown

when colour is noun

oh the girls oh the boys

their Innocent souls

prejudiced minds

what have we done

……..

Stalk, abuse or rape

fear in the nape

body wants, body gets

lust drives,money lets

My wants my passion

fast life in fashion

oh the girls oh the boys

their innocent souls

greed in the genes

what have we done

©SOMKRITYA

For years I have been reading violence of all sorts in newspaper’s but in past few years violence against kids and by kids have reached an alarming high rate..Its a scary world out there and we need to do something about it…..

You know what…This world needs more kick ass souls,people who are still human, to join hands and work together.

Those who understand you don’t need to love or like a person to help them out ..you help others because you are there and you can.

And because you do not like someone doesn’t give you a right to ridicule them or belittle them.what you do not understand is not necessarily wrong,what you do not follow doesn’t make it small or irrelevant

we have been passing on and giving out negative vibes to our kids,that has to change.

Not only we need to re-shape our selves but also the life we have been providing to our kids.

we need to bring back phantoms,mandrake,tin tins,hardy boys in our kids life, teach our kids friendship,tolerance,and compassion.

we have to make our kids good citizen..not just for you and me but for this whole world.

But along with that we need to teach them self-defense and also how to stand up for each other when time calls

buy boxing kits or whatever you think is appropriate and enroll them in self-defense classes.

there is so much to do and together we can bring the change in this ruthless love starved world

……………………………………………………….

I always participate in any and every campaign that promotes peace,education and awareness and am constantly looking out for new ways to educate our kids……and so when I chanced upon this book/campaign Leah has started, I decided to join it.

What I love about this book is it’s not just another preach the whole world book…It focuses on how to be a better more confidant woman. how to be that woman who not only stands for herself but also for her peers.

This book-I AM MORE THAN JUST A GIRL is more like an activity book which I would love to buy for my daughter and gift it to teenagers. It’s about training your thoughts,understanding your soul,your body,protecting it…when i was scrolling through the slide share presentaion i remembered the quote -Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.

Why not read what the author has to say about it.

~WELCOME~

This is not a self-help book. This is a guide that can be used for a young woman’s entire life. Topics include self-defense, domestic violence and bullying, sexual assault, career and education, acceptance of others, stress management, self-expression and beauty and body image. Readers are encouraged to try several creative exercises such as journaling, meditation, and self-expression to bring these important issues into their daily lives.

~Leah

To know more about this book click the following link

I AM MORE THAN JUST A GIRL

or just scroll through the slide share presentation,Trust me you will not be dissapointed..there are some activities which every mother/teacher needs to educate their daughters/sons/students about.

I Am More Than Just A Girl; Empowered. Informed. Equal

View more documents from ImpowerYou

Leah can also be contacted on her site-IMPOWER YOU

Lets begin by supporting each other and every one who is doing their bit

“Stand up and fight until you hear the bell,

Stand toe to toe, trade blow for blow

Keep punching til you hear that final bell,

Show them folks what you know.

Until you hear that bell, the final bell,

Stand up and fight like hell!”

( remember to fight for yourself ,your home,your country,your world….fight doesnt mean war,it means standing up against injustice and cruelty ,standing up and not let a bully ruin even a single life.standing up for each other and be a human )

Wish you all an inspired and blessed weekend

Filed under: My Poetry, Reviews By Me Tagged: book review, poetry, Postaweek2012, women impowerment, WordPress, writing

Chunni lal babu’s clock

Soma Mukherjee — Tue, 15 May 2012 07:43:09 +0000

Chunni lal babu’s old wall clock

was eating dust in an antique shop

every body was scared of it

and yet every one wanted to own it

human behaviour

how odd

Sensational news travels faster than light

it does and it did

at least regarding this clock

some said the watch was cursed

some said it was Chunnilal babu’s spirit

anyways, so the rumour was, that the clock

watches every thing the whole day

and right at midnight

instead of the usual ding-dong

sings out an important event of its choice

12 times

often putting people in the dock

why in the last house at the Raghav’s

it’s said, at 12 in the night it sang

Mr Raghav is cheating on his wife

12 times straight that too with a background music

of course Mr Raghav laughed it off

but suspicion is a worm and it eats you inside

so he ended up getting a divorce

and lost his job too

His Father in law was his boss

and the clock came back to the shop

the shopkeeper didn’t look shocked or amused

and I was the only one who found it strange

and then before that

in Little kittypong’s house

just at 12 it sang out loud

kittypong is eating all the biscuits

and putting the blame on the poor dog

how a dog could steal a key

open an almirah

and eat the biscuits

was puzzling

but his parents did believe that!

But after the incident

Kittypong got punishment

and the dog licked the clock

but the clock was sent back

cos it got the adults worried

who doesn’t have some secrets, right?

this went on and caused a lot of heart burn and anxiety

The people of the town thought

its better to burn down the clock

every one wanted the right to have an affair

with no fear of divorce or losing a job

and kids just wanted the freedom

to eat whatever and whenever

dogs were very sad and they howled in protest

but who listens to them

and so the clock was burned down

but then the strangest thing happened

there was a dust storm

and the clock’s ashes flew with that

and went inside every one

who didn’t cover up their nose

oh what a disaster

to start saying the truth

and 12 every night

last heard every one is divorced

and jobless in the town

Kids are grounded 24/7

and dogs don’t look that happy either

damn the clock

Truth- just when you don’t want it

Filed under: Insane Zone, My Poetry Tagged: Humor, poetry, Postaweek2012, story, WordPress, writing

Ma-माँ

Soma Mukherjee — Fri, 11 May 2012 20:38:30 +0000

A soul was ready

to wear a new body

and take its place on earth

it looked at God and smiled nervously

God smiled back and asked

Dear I sense anxiety in your core

Is it because your new life awaits you on earth

Soul nodded and waited anxiously for more

God knew it and so He asked

what is that one thing you would love to have when you go there

The soul asked for love,for hug,for warmth,for freedom,

for a Friend,for a mentor,for inspiration

it asked God for someone

who would take care of it as much and as well as

a root would of its leaves and flowers

God looked at the soul and chuckled

and said already a human haan

well why don’t I do one thing

make all your wishes come true with one precious gift

really- asked the surprised Soul

I cant wait to see what it would be

and the soul opened its eyes in a tiny little body

and That day for first time I saw my Gift

My MOTHER

[ Lets give every soul a chance and be loved just the way it was meant to be

This mothers day lets pledge to stop the Gender Discrimination and Female foeticide

for a soul knows no such difference it comes to this world hoping for a new beginning

lets embrace every soul in whichever body it chooses to come and start a new life. ]

Filed under: My Poetry Tagged: Mothers day poetry, poetry, Postaweek2012, WordPress, writing

Dear Winter

Soma Mukherjee — Thu, 10 May 2012 12:26:30 +0000

Summer has arrived and Sun won’t budge or wear a sun glass. Its on a mission to wring us dry. while the days are hot and humid ,nights play strange games,sometimes giving us some hope of a better tomorrow which never comes.Sitting in the comfort of an air conditioned house I can be as poetic as I want, while outside all the rhymes and free verses are drying up as fast as the greens. And in these times all I can think of is my Sweet sweet winter and the beautiful cozy blankets I once cursed, oh how naive and foolish i have been …..

Oh! winter I request thee please come back

To err is human cut me some slack

summer as always is scorching hot

and i have been thinking about you a lot

All we had was a silly lovers spat

And I was more than willing to work on that.

Then you became too cold and I almost froze

I needed warmth hence spring I chose.

Spring and me was this one time thing

It meant nothing, it was a stupid little fling

I was thinking about you the whole time I swear

Your absence is killing me, the grief is too much to bear.

You were fantastic, marvelous and cool

Still I went for spring I was a fool

It lured me with its flowery tranquil gait

But now I know its tricks, albeit a bit too late.

Spring left me high and dry to sulk in this summer

Its horrible and sweaty and life is a bummer

My world is barren no poetry or prose in soul

Angels left with spring and the evil summer is taking its toll

Oh Winter…….

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: Humor, humour, Online Writing, poetry, Postaweek2012, Spring, summer, WordPress, writing

Curio’s Incredible Journey -4 By Stuart Young

Soma Mukherjee — Mon, 07 May 2012 19:47:17 +0000

A good story will never let you down

in this land of story you will find everything

flying horses,talking frogs,dancing dragons

and if you are a dreamer like me

you will know how some of the characters of stories

will be after your life

and some will be there to help you out

what you learn from each story will be yours

for, a good story will never let you down

it will teach you something very valuable

may be about you or the choices you will make

some of the stories will give you mantra

and some will be cautionary tales

But a good story will never let you down

will teach you new songs

will weave its magic through your emotions

stir some ripples in your heart

which will help you connect with fellow humans

will help you understand others better

for a good story will never let you down

you will cry,laugh and travel with them

and dream about them

they will heal your soul

soothe some raw nerves

some may bring back to life things you buried deep inside

BUT A GOOD STORY WILL NOT LEAVE YOU UNTOUCHED

IT WILL NEVER LET YOU DOWN

Stuart Young’s 4th book on the Adventures of Curio the Sloth is out …what joy

Curio listens to his inner voice and understands his dreams and starts this journey on this path never travelled before and boy does he face danger.

Stuart shocked me with the 4th part,imagine cute little sloth on a raft in mid sea drifting to nowhere cos a storm sent him off his course…oh my heart goes out to the little brave soldier. what happened to cute little Curio?

Will he reach land,wasn’t the sea shark infested..Did Curio survive those treacherous waves and the hungry monsters..read it out to know more.

But will have to warn you,this isn’t just a sweet story anymore..cos like it or not life will not be sweet all the times…and alone you shall be sometimes and scared and find dark tunnels every where you look, some choices you make will be package deals and you will have to embrace everything and make the best of what you get. Discard the ones which are not working,make new plans again….

every road you see and walk on today,if you think it was this easy since the beginning you can’t be more wrong!

but should you stop and go back..may be, but not forever, comeback with a new plan and continue this journey..This my dear is life

GOd made us, gave us this beautiful place to live in and gave us each a basket full of goodies….some, we will like some, we wont but what we do with them will make us….so are you ready :)

are you ready to start this new day with the goodies you have inside

are you ready to walk run and dance on the beautiful song that is life

Are you ready to travel with Curio

Click the link below to read the 4th part

Curio’s Incredible Journey-4 By STUART YOUNG

Those who wish to contact Stuart please click the link given below.

http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com/

Wish you all Goodreads

Curio and The Great Ridge-1 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)
Curio Begins to remember -2 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)
Curio’s Next Adventure-3 by Stuart Young (somkritya.wordpress.com)

Filed under: Story Tagged: Curio, Great Ridge, inspiration, Postaweek2012, short story, Sloth, story, WordPress, writing

The Third eye of Mata Soma

Soma Mukherjee — Fri, 04 May 2012 06:55:54 +0000

In the beginning there was nothing and God said let there be light,but when the lights were switched on God saw a lot of Indians roaming around. It was shocking cos He had Adam and eve in his mind, but Indians had totally foiled his plans of launching those two people.

He asked the Indians what are you doing here and how did you come here before I could send my people..to which one of the highly intellectual and well read Indian replied..excuse me God but we have more that 100 gods,why would we wait for you to send Adam and eve??

And this is how The Indian supremacy over the world began, so whenever i hear people saying oh Indians stole our jobs I say..what rubbish, more gods,more rights, which part is not clear?Indians were on this planet much much before Americans,English people and all other dubbed movie language people( like french,spanish) arrived from mars and venus.

And since we came early we also had time to compartmentalize gods like god for education,god for money,god for rain..we even have god for marriage..that is the reason why we are getting married all the time and have such a huge population..why we have god for that too,i mean to have kids..we have god for everything…and also we have had enough time to develop our third eye…

( A note to people making fun of Indians – you guys with one God puhleease we were performing miracles when you were learning to make fire)

Now many Gods also means many God-men too right..no not the ones in temples,but the self-proclaimed ones..who after trying everything under the sun have finally understood they were sent here to con people

BTW Con is a bad word for English people and other dubbed movie language people not for us..here we take pride in conning.

After almost 39 years on this planet I finally understood all the why’s and what’s too and so I have decided to rename my self MATA SOMA and booked a big hall which will be known as –

THE THIRD EYE OF MATA SOMA HALL..

here I will meet my devotees, listen to their grievances and bless them.

It really is very simple and easy and if you want to know more and join me later in my pledge to spread love and money as far as possible,why you have come to right place.I have been watching all the babas and matas closely for quite sometime and am sure I know everything.

Here are some examples of how I will solve the problems

Devotee 1- Mata I am 29-year-old and not getting married. have met four girls and all of them rejected me,now even the milk man makes fun of me . what should I do ??

Mata(me): tell your milk man he was a donkey in his previous life and order him to bray and then distribute red framed sunglasses to all the girls in neighbourhood for free. with in a month you will get married.

Devotee 2: Mata I am 49-year-old and still very poor and my boss pays me peanuts what to do?

Mata: Hmm this will require special blessings..put some money in that mans pocket( could be you if you join me ) and offer 5 litres of peanut oil to your boss. he will increase your salary.

Devotee 3: Mata I am 78-year-old and still no child( at this point lot of gasps will be heard but not because she is old trying to have kid but because how useless is a woman who cannot bear a child)

Mata: come here child you need a hug…( my devotees will sing matas hug destroying the bug song)now tell me child I will ask..why do I see a cow around you…

Devotee3 : no mata I don’t have a cow

Mata: no there is a cow, may be your parents have had it

Devotee: no mata no one in our family has ever had a cow

Mata what rubbish your ancestors were always living in city or what….somewhere between cave men and modern man one of your ancestors had a cow….

Devotee: speechless

Mata: donate two cows of same blood line as the one your ancestors had to a poor man and with in a month you will have a child.

Devotee: but Mata where will I find a cow of same bloodline

Mata: where there is a will there is a cow

impressive haan

all i need is a few indians to be my people…you know wearing some special outfit and do good PR and get me a prime time slot on television…

Phoren people, my friends in need, please help me out here I will get a lot of popularity if i will have some of you guys as my followers..also you can write about the blessing that i am and the miracles that i perform, in your blogs

If you read the tags you will find parenting,cos by doing this you will be setting up an excellent example for your kids too

A suggestion to wordpress people please understand Baba is not babes and do not try to correct my spelling everytime…its very Racist

kindly contact me asap at my email id_ matacon@thirdeye.com

Filed under: Insane Zone Tagged: Humor, Parenting, Postaweek2012, satire, WordPress, writing

somkritya » Soma Mukherjee

A Dinner never Lies

Curio’s new friends-5 by Stuart Young

Related articles

The Lambretta Girl

Ya-aawn

Just a woman…..

Chunni lal babu’s clock

Ma-माँ

Dear Winter

Curio’s Incredible Journey -4 By Stuart Young

Related articles

The Third eye of Mata Soma