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Autism – The Staring Strangers

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Just imagine a day when You go out to a nearby store to buy grocery and wherever you go, eyes follow you, you can feel those eyes on you, looking at you, almost as if waiting for you to make a mistake and prove them right,  talking in a hush-hush voice, but you know it’s all about you, some stares of pity, some of disgust.

you leave the store go to a restaurant to eat,  order something and look forward to enjoying a great meal,trying to shrug off that eerie feeling in the shop earlier but the restaurant is no different, people are eating and their conversation has shifted from whatever they were discussing to you, they are looking at you the way kids look at a new animal in a zoo, talk about you watch your every move as if this is the first time they have seen a human eating..

Rest of the day no matter where you go what you do eyes follow you,and so do whispers….

HOW WAS IT ?

This is a day in the life of most autistic kids and everyday of their lives they will have to live with these stares ..

and it wont change if you don’t,

you can’t change if your thinking doesn’t,

your thinking wont change if you do not educate yourself ..

Learn about people around you,learn how to live in a society where different people will live, some will be Autistic, some dyslexic, some both, mentally and/or  physically different from the “normal people”

Know that staring at some one makes them feel extremely uncomfortable, no matter what they say, it is rude..if you can’t care then don’t, but do not stare at people just cos they are different from you…

STARING IS NOT THERAPY,STARING DOES NOT HEAL OR CURE THEM. STARING IS NOT HELPING.

It is hard not to stare at things different but you have to know when to move on..for a parent trying to calm down their kid having a meltdown is not an easy task, they need all the space they can get at that moment, unsolicited advices from people who have no idea, telling them about disciplining kids is not going to help , in fact it will make the situation much worse fo the kid and the parents. Best help is to clear the area for a while and give them a breathing space and if you happen to be a special educator then you know what you have to do…

I am a mother of a lovely 13 year of girl with autism, she can pick up any tune on piano just by listening to it once, she is extremely computer savvy, she is a good singer and dancer and she is a very loving caring girl, she is all these and more and she is very sensitive… ….

she knows it when people are making fun of her, talking about her, laughing at her or staring  and all these things  upset her and when she is upset she never performs, never shows what she can do ..withdraws into a shell.

There are times when she gets irritated, like by the buzzing sound (bees or welding) or loud noise or a fight or when she is trying to communicate but no one around her is able to understand her and she cries and pushes anyone who tries to hug her…She is not being Rude, this is her asking for help, telling you something is bothering her a lot..

There are hundreds of kids like her , you may know one.

Next time you get to meet someone like my daughter in a small store, a restaurant or a shopping mall, different from ‘normal’ kids, let them be, you didn’t come all the way to this shop to stare at the kid, did you?

Different is not necessarily bad, sometimes we are scared of different just because we don’t know anything about it and when we get to know it we are surprised cos all of a sudden ‘the change,  the different’ is  not scary anymore. ..world is evolving and so are traits in humans..some for good and  some may not be great but they are what they are..some of the rarely found traits or conditions are now seen more…what was 1 in 200 a few years back is now around 1 in 88….

This is Today,This is Future with a lot of things way different from when you were a kid ..

This is Life today, there will be more changes,  more  different tomorrow…

A beautiful story By Autumn, a must read-

The Purple Gummy Bear

(please share)

October Festivals in India and Wombat day

October has been kind so far, not without the allergies and flu’s, but kind and with many reasons to celebrate. The Bengali‘s  are gearing up for Durga puja ( celebrating goddess Durga‘s victory over the evil demon Mahishasur) others are decorating pandals for RamaNavmi ( the period when Lord Ram ( Ramayana) killed The king of demons Ravana ( lot of cultures celebrate differently and have a slightly different versions).

Durga Idol in Vizag Durga Puja

Both are 10 days of grand celebrations, Festival of colours, food, people of streets, tons of shopping  and laughter..but food comes first.
And If you thought Indian food is all about curries then think again..
Go for Luchi and Kosha mangsho, Macher chop, Mochar ghonto, Devils chop, Patishapta, Rashogulla, Payesh, Shondesh …..oh I can go one and this will be a very big post.
We Bengali’s are known for our passion for Food,Songs,Dance and Books… Next time you want to try Indian food, ask for some Gujarati/ Bengali/South Indian  sweets and savouries, trust me you will forget the curries.
But October this year has given me one more reason to be happy, 22nd of this month is World Wombat day and its a big day not just for my lovely friends the Wombies from Wombania.com  but all of us part Wombies too :)
It will be  day of fun, humour, chocolates, marshmallows, spams, double chocolates, triple chocolates, death by chocolates, crazychoco delights and love, in short everything that can make this world a better place.
So while Mrs.Bee stings everybody in town,
Mr.Grr never stops finding fault every adjective,verb and noun
Tom and Brady hallucinate being in star wars
& Peter and Mash dream and fantasize about turbo power flying cars,
Sarah prays day and night for a magical moonstone
And Jason spends whole day perfecting macaroons and scones
Humpty Dumpty enjoy a  fight between werewolves and vampires
and Doomsday Preppers get ready for the alien attacks  on the human empire
while politicians keep making promises trying to win the polls
and everything else is hacked every now and then by the  trolls
let us for this one day forget everything and enjoy the day with chocolates and Wombats.
I made this short promotional teaser for those who want to know more,  its  a 2 minute clip so please do watch it.and do not forget to visit the wombies and book your seat( its free )
I surf around in wombie land even when it is not a cartoon day,there is so much fun. And if you don’t see me there then know that there is something seriously wrong on my side. Being the extremely considerate blogger that I am I  have a wombie absent chart prepared for you.
This will tell you why I may be missing from all the wombania fun.
  1. Didn’t comment on wombie cartoon once- i am sick
  2. Missed the second cartoon too- very very sick
  3. what!!!! not there for the 3rd cartoon :shock: –  kidnapped..send a search party guys!
  4. nope didnt show up for the fourth time in a row- read prayers for my departed soul ( damn she was a great soul, Why god why)
  5. sudden come back after being absent for a long interval- released from jail ( hey i aint no saint )
so now you know every thing about everything, do visit Wombania on 22nd for fun and try a different Indian cuisine next time :)
wish you all a lovely weekend :)

Never hug a Tiger

In the Jungle of Ti lived a tiger
who one night hugged a spider
they were drunk and it was halloween
strange spells were floating in those deep dark greens
now the tiger just sits and spins webs and traps food
but when the spider roars and runs, insects laugh, how rude!

October News Blues

As soon as October hit the town so did a Horrible terrible news. Someone was told by someone, who got this news from someone who was told by this someone that  3rd of October was going to be the scariest spookiest night

That was all that was said on the first of this month, some one tweeted, some re-tweeted, some blogged. some re-blogged and soon it became bigger than what was said in the beginning…..

By morning of 3rd October of it was end of the world news,

3oo demons who were aliens who were zombies
with venom of pit viper were going to attack the town
But Julien was angry not scared that day
she had just spent so much on her wedding gown!!
some took all that they could and hid under their bed,
some took refuge in their wine cellar and drank whole night.
( it was their tribute to their collection )
some drove as fast as they could to get out of the town and reach someplace safe, but landed up in jail for a night
( it is the safest place on earth, ask the Politicians)
some hid in the grave yard ( brilliant,
cos none of the 300 evil venom spewing monsters would have ever looked there)
some decided to stay in their cars, some on the roofs, some in the tree house
and some just ran and ran and ran till they could run no more (and broke all the world records)
Then there was this rock band which was not popular at all, they played their music on the street’s whole night
(The idea was to get famous like the musicians of Titanic)
This must be the reason why the town was spared that night, said someone later (some one is jealous of the band )
And then there was little Kipkomp who painted his mom’s favourite sheet black and wrapped around him to become invisible
(I am sure his mom got a bad heart burn that night
but it was last day on earth kind of situation so she kept mum)
3oo demons who were aliens who were zombies
with venom of pit viper were going to attack the town
some tried keeping calm and helping others
But the brave spent the night with cuss, fuss and frown
Everyone prayed and asked god to spare their lives in exchange for all the good they had done or thought and wished the scary things attacked someone else, like the politician they didn’t like  or the one who knew their secret or someone who they thought was not worthy of life at all.
[Angels were busy shredding wishes like these that night]
Anyways so nothing happened that night and morning of 4th everyone found out, it was all just a rumour. People made fun of each other and claimed they knew all about  it from the very beginning and were playing along to see how far others would go.
3oo demons who were aliens who were zombies
with venom of pit viper were going to attack the town
Jim was just pretending to be scared
But Mr X , oh he is such a clown!
So next day when the entire town was busy with doing nothing good, our Little Kipkomp was trembling with fear, for him the rumour had become truth and a scary thing was coming for her favourite sheet which was now painted black. He was praying with all he had for at least one alien attack.
( Please God help,how many times does a kid ask you for an alien or a monster attack
if you help me today I  promise I will listen to mom and not draw  on the walls)
Help!!!!
                                                                             ♠♠♠
                       *****************************************************************
I am so glad it turned out to be a rumour and everyone is safe .
BTW did you hear what they are saying about 6th of this month…All the spirits evil and bad…..
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